Oh-twelve.

HAPPY NEW YEAR!  OH, TWELVE!  I've got some things I'd like to accomplish this year including trying to honestly care for myself, travel big (Viet Nam in March. Possibilities: Chicago, Arizona, New Orleans, & Miami), perhaps get something significant done to the house, and KMHD and I will lay out a timeline for our future business endeavor and start doing the dull tasks that entails.  That's a manageable list.  I broke a big, nasty habit last year (smoking cigarettes - eeeew!) and would like to try to either break another bad habit or start a good one.  I'm not going to file all of this under 'resolutions' because it's something I'm constantly working towards anyway and I don't think I really gain from the benefits of a new year bounce.

The Cabin/NYE was sublime this go around.  It's really all in the company you keep.  ATM, KMHD, Jonathan, Steve & Shawn were the stars of the show with special guests Andrew & Hannah.  I did miss Collin, though.  I stayed up beyond the stroke of midnight, drank steadily throughout w/o forming a sour disposition or a sour stomach, and this hangover is actually manageable.  Nothing that copious amounts of ice water, couch lounging & a Lush bathbomb can't help.  Over the course of the evening, I took stock of my life -- I like where some things are going, but some things (and people) make me really unhappy.  A few adjustments and straight up severing negative ties and everything will be much improved.  Housekeeping.

Anyway.

I can't tell you how many times I've considered closing shop and starting anew.  I've struggled with content & substance and the lack thereof.  But, wait, didn't I start this thing as a place to keep track of what I've been up to, so it'd be sequential and orderly when I need to do some recalling?  It's a journal.  Picking up regular readers, really, is just bonus.  Thanks for being here.

I think the struggle, too, is that I can't write.  Ho ho!  THERE, I SAID IT.  I do not have the talent to express in written word, and sometimes out loud, what it is I'm feeling, which is ultra frustrating.  If you don't have anything to say, don't, right?  Too, I don't like having my time wasted, so I try not do that to others.  I don't want this to be a waste of time, mine or yours.  Schizophrenic.  Paranoid.  Uch, I'll get it sorted.  

I do know what I don't want FEAR ANTS to be & that's a start.